Finding Happiness

I apologize that we have been radio silent.  We took a little break from our adoption application this summer.

Speaking from the heart.... infertility sucks!  Feeling hurt, jealous, anger, and depressed are not who we are but those are the emotions that had begun to consume us.  I feel like I was trying so hard to appear OK that I did not deal with the loss.  We knew we needed to find our happiness again before continuing forward, so we chose to begin counseling.  In one of my appointments, my counselor asked if my goal was to be pregnant or to be a mom. That question really resonated with me because I realized I was so focused on not being able to conceive that I couldn't see the ultimate goal which is to be a mommy and care for a beautiful baby.  For anyone who is thinking about speaking to a counselor, I would highly recommend it.   I am not saying that we are 'fixed' but I feel we are headed on the right path again.

Our application is almost complete and we are hoping to turn it in very soon.  Lots of friends and family have been asking us to re-open the t-shirt fundraiser so we did today!  Thank you so much for your support and sharing our story.  We love seeing pictures of yall wearing our love shirts!

"You may not have my eyes, you may not have my smile, but you have all of my heart."

Long Time No See

Wow,  I didn't realize how long it had been since I posted.  I have never been great at keeping up with a journal.  I am really sorry because we created this blog to invite our friends and family along in our journey and I have been radio silent.  I will try my best to post more often.


We are almost finished with our application.  I never imagined it would take this long but it has.  We still need to gather a couple more documents and make our profile book.  This book is a photo scrapbook that is presented to birth mothers so they can get a glimpse into our life.  I have started working on this book several times but it overwhelms me because this will be the first image she has of us and I want it to be perfect.


Luckily, when I get stressed I start looking at baby stuff.  :-)  A month or so ago Mom got the itch to go baby shopping and I was happy to oblige.  I had so much fun looking at everything and getting an idea of furniture and items we might want for our nursery.  I found the bedding that has become the inspiration for the nursery on etsy.  It's navy, white, grey, and mint green.  It's so stinkin' cute but so stinkin' expensive so I am going to try and recreate as much of it as I can.


Matt and I knew that choosing to adopt was not going to be cheap.  $37,000 is a huge chunk of money especially for two teachers.  The agency we have chosen to go with asks for the money when we are matched with a birth mother.  A worry for us is that we will not have the money when it comes time. We could be matched right after we finish the home study or it could be months. We have started saving and have received donations from people near and dear to our hearts.  Our hope is that we will have a chunk saved before our home study is complete then we can apply for grants. There are just so many unknowns when it comes to money and we know we need to lean on God and trust he is in control.


Speaking of raising money...The Diehl family is hosting a huge garage sale tomorrow and we spent all day sorting and preparing for it.  Hopefully, this will be a very successful fundraiser!  So many friends and family have donated items; Matt and I are so very thankful for the love we have received.  If you are able to stop by, we would love to see you and maybe you will find something you can't live without. :-)